John and I kicked around in the same singles wards for several years before we both *ahem* were “asked” to leave due to our advancing years. In other words, we both got old. Since then, we still run into each other every now and then, and occasionally trade snarky remarks via social media.
When I told the Facebook world I was doing the 12 Dates of Christmas and needed some volunteers, John’s comment was, “This sounds fraught with peril.” The next day he chatted with me on Facebook and asked all sorts of questions about the logistics of my project. After I had explained my game plan, or pretty much my lack thereof, he said he was up for joining the ranks.
Wise choice, John. Wise choice.
We decided to lace up our bowling shoes and hit the lanes for our date.
What I didn’t know when we were planning was that John actually has HIS OWN bowling shoes and ball. True story. He is hard core.
Not only does he come with his own gear, but he totally broke 100 in all three games we played. I, on the other hand, did not. I think it’s due to the fact that the bowling alley employee input my name as “Mello.” How are you supposed to have a good game when your name is Mello? It’s a wonder my ball even knocked down ANY pins.
John tried really hard to make me feel better about my low scores. I believe his exact words were, “Eh, I’ve seen worse.” Comforting.
Here are the top three things I learned about bowling while on our date:
- Apparently bowling is a sport fraught with peril and injuries. Enough so that they have to put a warning screen up that you agree to before starting your game.
- My bowling game improves significantly when a Justin Bieber is playing over the bowling alley stereo.
- John’s bowling game improves significantly when a Justin Bieber stops playing over the bowling alley stereo.
Of course, a good game of bowling (or in my case, a bad game of bowling) really works up your appetite. Despite the bowling alley’s constant promotion of their newest burger, which can only be described as an instant heart attack, we opted to go to Nielsen’s and get some frozen custard.
For those of you unfamiliar with the DC (Davis County, that is), Nielsen’s is a staple in Bountiful. Because I’m a DC transplant, I’ve only been there a couple of times—stop judging me—but I’m never one to pass on sugary treats. In this case, I’m really glad I didn’t, because that’s where John revealed the secret to a long and healthy life.
There are two secrets to a long life:
1.) Never eat food off the streets in Mexico;
2.) Never eat bowling alley food.
And since it was impossible to know what to talk about after wisdom like that has been revealed, we called it a night.
Even though we’ve known each other for years, it was fun getting to know John better. And now I kind of want my own bowling ball and shoes. Is that weird?